Jana
by Wanna Be Starting Something
Summary: Set in East Germany, 1961, Jana must leave Eastern Germany and cross the Berlin Wall. Through the story, she will be confronted by love, sex, turmoil, hurt and death.
1. Tears and a Warning

**Note from the Author:**** I wrote this when I was 12 and my English teacher said it wasn't great. 4 years later, I found a copy of it, and thought I would ask what you guys think. I typed it out again and tweaked it a little, but I really want to know what you guys think of it. Please review, and be brutally honest! If you aren't impressed, there is more to upload, which might be slightly better, I hope! Enjoy.**

**Chapter 1**

Jana sat by her Grandpa's side. She didn't know what to say. It wasn't that she was in shock, it was guilt. Her grandfather had collapsed earlier that day and had been struggling to breathe all day. Yet, Jana had not shed a single tear. She didn't know why. Sometimes she felt like crying, but the tears never appeared. Maybe it was living a life for sixteen years in the back alleys of the Eastern side of the Berlin Wall. She had been living where ever she could. She moved through the city and out of trouble and out of sight, solitary and alone, sleeping anywhere that was quiet, eating anything that was edible.

Helga, the Austrian girl, who was staying with them until she earned enough money to return home, was fighting back the tears. Jana could tell that she was being strong for her sake. But still Jana didn't need to be strong. She loved her Grandpa more than anything in the world, but had only stayed with him for a few weeks. She barely knew the man who had, in the past few days, had become a father to her. She valued her grandfather and was glad to have him in her life and was sad to let him go. But the truth was, she had never truly let him in. She was reserved and cold with him. She wouldn't show emotion to him. She wouldn't be the normal girl that she really wanted to be. She told herself it was because she didn't want to get hurt, she didn't want to be vulnerable, she said she didn't need support. She didn't know why, but she never let anyone in.

Jana heard her Grandpa's breathing increase. She suddenly became alert and composed herself. He grabbed her hand, squeezed it tightly and pulled her close. He whispered into her ear.

"Get out of Germany. Whatever the cost. Do what it takes. Khrushchev's built that wall, there's no knowing what he'll do next. Go to Geneva. I know people. They will help you bring the wall down."

Then kissed her on the forehead, and rested back on his pillow, closing his eyes as he went. He was gone before his head hit the pillow.

Helga, unable to control herself, collapsed onto the bed in a flood of tears, her body shaking. Jana stood up, desperate to keep her composure. She struggled to keep morose and morbid thoughts out of her head, stopping herself from linking other memories of her grandfather to this. But all she could think about was the image of her grandfather lying on the bed, dead. Over the moans and shrieks of Helga, Jana felt for probably the first time in her life, a sense of real sadness. Yet, still no tears would come. Then she did as she had always done in moments of despair. She turned her back on the body of the last living relative. As she stepped out of the door into the twilight, Helga's screams could still be heard, but only though Jana's ears.


	2. Grey Haze

**Note from the Author: I apologise for such a long delay – this chapter needed a lot more work than I thought.**

**Please review!**** I really want to know what you guys think of it, and be brutally honest! One of the other guys on this website threatened not to post the next chapter unless he got at least 5 reviews, so it's always an option…..only joking…If you are reading, please submit ideas for me to incorporate. **

**Can I please make it clear that a lot of the historical details will probably not be totally accurate, but I have tried my best to make it vaguely realistic.**

**Chapter 2**

Another week went by, and still the body lay there, untouched and serene. Usually on this side of the wall, the corpses of the dead were laid in the street to be stuffed into a body bag, and then driven in a cattle cart to the coast to be thrown into the sea. But both Helga and Jana had agreed that they would find another way to send him off.

In the midst of their mourning, Jana noticed that Helga had begun to make plans to move on, leaving Jana would have no choice but to leave too. The words of her grandfather had haunted her, going round her head in circles. Jana knew that she would need to leave soon. But, for now, the two girls tried not to trouble themselves with mourning and funeral arrangements. For the time being they silently watched the evening news on the small ramshackle television set and endeavoured to forget the tragedy of their surroundings.

The general circulation of news was of little interest to Jana; it was simply monotonous reports of local riots, minor looting and the weather, nothing of real journalistic value. Then something came on that made Jana sit up.

"...report that the juvenile convict, Alec Hagden, 17, has escaped from a juvenile detention centre…."

An image of the escaped convict flashed up on screen. Jana was immediately struck by his face, seemingly innocent, yet with intense eyes that showed strength and familiarity with turmoil. His features were soft and delicate; his face was smooth but riddled with uneven stubble, with a strong jaw-line and dark rings around his eyes.

She blinked; the grey haze faded and the world came into focus. The voice from the set began talking about Khrushchev's plans for Eastern Berlin. Jana had always been interested with politics and fiercely opposed to the wall and the Soviet Union's new government. She thought that she took after her grandfather; he had worked for the government, and high ranking job, but she had never been told the details of his position. She always said that with the help of her grandfather's high rank, she would bring down the Soviet Union. In her frustration, she switched the set off and sat there.

She felt more relaxed and satisfied after having had a little rant to her about the political disregard in this country; she dragged herself back into her chair and tried to go to sleep. She felt the bend in the wood dig into her spine as she drifted off. She blocked out everything that had happened. She blocked out the image of her grandfather, his warning, Helga's screams, the wall. She just floated into her own little world.

Her mind wandered again and the boy's face came back into her head. The details of his capture and the charges against him seemed to resurface as well. She recalled when he had first been caught; he was sighted hanging around the wall, looking suspicious. She pondered on this detail. What was he doing? Did he know something that she didn't? Was there a weak spot in the wall? If she was to get to Geneva, she needed to get over that wall. And she needed to find this boy who would tell her how.


	3. A Scared Little Girl

**Note from the Author: A huge thank you to Patricia Sage , Temora ****and**** TryFindingForever for your reviews, comments and inspiration as great writers – I really appreciate it!**

**Please review**** – I really want to know what guys think! Be brutally honest, it doesn't have to be really long!**

**Whilst this is really short (uncharacteristically short for me, normally I am really verbose), this is a relatively big chapter for Jana, and a lot of these details will come back in the rest of the story. I promise that Chapter 4 will come really soon**

**If you guys zoom in on the page so you only see a few lines at a time as you read, it might make this a better read cos you get the suspense which is harder when you know when I'm going to stop. Sorry if that makes no sense.**

**I hope you enjoy it!**

**Chapter 3**

She finally did drift off and did fall asleep. Her dreams were vivid and confusing; the scene changed almost as quickly as it had come.

She dreamt of climbing the wall with the boy; she was clinging to the wall, peering down at the smiling boy at the bottom, egging her on. The scene changed and she was hanging from the cold stone face of the wall, miles high above the ground, which lay far below, out of sight. The scene changed and she picturing the white light of a Soviet spotlight catching her on the wall, illuminating her wide eyes, like a rabbit in the headlights. The scene changed and she saw the boy running out of sight as she fell from the wall and landed on her knees on the wet ground and a Soviet guard was walking up to her. The scene changed and he was so close to her face; the guard lifted her chin and raised her with one hand, pushing her into the wall. She wanted to move but she was paralysed. Memories began to take over her dream, and she felt herself falling back into her past. The scene became more vivid, more familiar, more real, more horrible, more frightening, more terrifying. She felt his sweaty, large, cold hands run around her hips, up her stomach, up, up up….

She awoke with a scream, breathing deeply, sweating, tears in her eyes, threatening to fall and show her for what she truly was; a scared little girl. She sat up, clutching her chest, clinging to her pounding heart, breathing deeply, feeling the blood pulse through her at impossible speed, faster than the terror that swept across her face when she thought of the dream, the memory.

She leaned to the side, as she let out a quiet sob. She closed her eyes and for a moment wondered…she pondered on the shoulder she could lay her head on, the strong, sure hands she could hold, the strong arms to hold her, the chest she could cry on, the sound of a soothing voice, cooing her. She saw the hands of a boy cradle her head, his arms around her, pulling her into his chest. She rested her head against the boy's chest and sobbed, tears streaking down her face, staining his shirt. She let it all out, weeping into this boy who would never leave her. She felt his warm touch on her neck, raising her head to face his, lifting her eyes to lock with his. His lips opened and closed, uttering silent words, almost in slow motion, three words. Then he leant in, she turned her head slightly, his lips coming closer and closer to hers, his warm velvety scent inching closer and closer until….

She hit the back of the armchair, and opened her eyes. One tear escaped, and fell slowly down her cheek. She sobbed to herself as she realised just how lonely she really was.


End file.
